I’m sure you’ve all heard, “If Jesus can walk on water, Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.” And maybe even, “Chuck Norris doesn’t lift weights, when he touches them, they try to fly away and he pulls them back down.” But I have an even better reason why Chuck Norris is great. He brings people together.
That’s the price I pay per gallon in my area.
And I can’t even get public transit to get me to work on time, even if I leave an hour early.
That’s America’s love affair with oil for you. We can fight wars for oil in Africa and the Middle East, but I can’t get ten miles with a fucking bus pass.
You know, I used to have pride in my country…
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